When you succeed at something, not everyone who applauds you is necessarily happy for you. Unfortunately, jealousy is more common than we care to admit. Whether you believe in it or not, jealousy can be a powerful force, albeit a negative one.
In my younger years, I was deeply involved in spiritual circles and churches. I was searching for knowledge and meaning, trying to find myself. I did not doubt that something lay beyond our earthly lives, though I wasn’t entirely sure what it was. I wanted answers, so I embarked on a journey of spiritual development, hoping to gain greater insight. What I did not realise at the time was that, in my quest for knowledge, I had overlooked the fact that others on the same path saw me as a threat.
During this period, my healing ability was discovered. Becoming a healer was never my intention, and in some ways, I was disappointed because I had aspired to become a reader. Others, however, celebrated my healing ability and treated me like a ‘celebrity’. Naturally, I enjoyed the attention, given how young and naive I was. What I failed to recognise was that some people were jealous of my healing ability and secretly resented me. While they might spend an entire week waiting to see one or two patients, the church would be packed on the day I was on duty, with people waiting outside for their turn to see me.
I still remember the expression on the face of a senior member of the church committee when she saw how many people were waiting to see me. I took her reaction as a compliment, when, in retrospect, it seemed to reflect envy rather than admiration.
Then the ‘attacks’ began. Some were personal, while others took the form of inexplicable occurrences that affected me on many levels, including physically. At times, I fell gravely ill. I was involved in several life-threatening accidents and suffered serious injuries. My world seemed to be collapsing around me, and I struggled to maintain both my faith and my sanity.
Eventually, the hostility became deeply personal, and a campaign to undermine my character began. I knew it was time to leave the church. Although I was relieved, I was also saddened at the thought of leaving behind the people who had come to see me and whom I had served.
Paula, an older spiritual friend I held in the highest regard, reassured me that those meant to find me would seek me out. I spoke honestly with her, explaining that I had never sought to become a healer and that, in some respects, I was disappointed not to have achieved what I had originally set out to do. She reminded me that healing was among the greatest gifts one could receive when following in Christ’s footsteps and serving others.
With time, I began to see the bigger picture and to understand what might have been behind the resentment directed towards me. My healing ability attracted all kinds of people and energies, some good, some bad, and some that I perceived as downright evil. As I came to appreciate the significance of what I had been given, I began to recognise my healing ability as a sacred gift. My attitude changed, and I learned to cherish and fully embrace it.
The journey, however, came at a considerable cost. I endured some painful experiences, and their effects remain with me to this day. Yet, despite everything, I stand tall and take pride in having served others in that capacity. I feel deeply honoured to have been entrusted with such a gift.
