Some people believe that we choose our parents prior to our earthly incarnation. In other words, we select our mothers and fathers before we are born. After more than forty years as a reader and healer, and after working with hundreds of broken souåls, I do not accept this theory for several reasons.
If we assume for a moment that it is true, how can it account for those who suffer at the hands of abusive parents? Some parents behave in ways that are deeply harmful and leave lasting damage. Others go even further. There are those who attempt to justify this by suggesting that such children have chosen this path as a form of learning. I find it difficult to see any meaningful benefit in pain and suffering at any level, particularly when the harm comes from those who are meant to offer refuge, security, and love.
If we are truly here to learn through suffering, then it would follow that we should stop helping anyone in distress, since doing so would interfere with their supposed learning experience. By the same logic, we should not prosecute those who harm others, as they would be facilitating that learning. This conclusion feels not only troubling but untenable.
After years of volunteering in A and E departments as a healer and caring for patients in palliative settings, I have seen little to suggest that suffering offers any inherent benefit. On the contrary, it often distances people from hope. Many lose part of their faith, if not all of it. I struggle to see any value in that outcome.
